My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Randomize
