This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Randomize
