Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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