wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
