Moan for me like Helen Keller
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
