Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Randomize
