It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Randomize
