Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
