no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize