took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
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If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
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I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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