I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
People in love make me want to vomit
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
