a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
