sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
