We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
