I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
