I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Randomize