I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Randomize
