Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
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