last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
