I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
