a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
