dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
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