I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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