i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
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I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
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He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
last night I used snow as a chaser
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