my mouth tastes like poor choices
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
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