We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
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