Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Randomize