did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
