If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
I've blown a few things in my day
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction