mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize