For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
Randomize
