Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
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