I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
We have started to decorate penises.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
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