Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Randomize
