you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
Rumble strips road head = magical
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
