Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(917): View more from New York City

I think I just saw someone hide a body.

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(501): View more from Arkansas

He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!

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(607): View more from New York

Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless

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21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
Read it at the TFLN blog
(412): View more from Pennsylvania

i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal

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(919): View more from North Carolina

She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.

(919): View more from North Carolina

All she wanted was a cigarette

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(859): View more from Kentucky

Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up

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(727): View more from Florida

I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?

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(706): View more from Georgia

We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning

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