Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
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Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
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