Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
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