Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
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