I think I died a long time ago.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
The Olympian is in my bed
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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