How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize