how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
