well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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