Someone shit on the floor
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
i need to put some appletini on your dick
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Randomize
