summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize