he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
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One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
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Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
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