i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
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