Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
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