Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.

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(301): View more from Maryland

Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night

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(248): View more from Michigan

I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?

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21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
Read it at the TFLN blog
(410): View more from Maryland

Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.

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(970): View more from Colorado

I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big

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(602): View more from Arizona

Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago

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(630): View more from Illinois

Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?

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