So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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