what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Randomize